This weekend I hit the bike path near our house.
And I found myself again staring at the steep climb that stands between the trailhead and home.
That’s when I turned to my husband and said, “This hill pisses me off.”
He laughed. I was mad, because deep down I WANT to climb and conquer that hill.
And yet, every bike ride, I’d hop off my bike and jog/push my bike up the hill instead.
I was scared to try.
Scared I might fall. (I could get hurt.)
Scared to not make it up. (And feel embarrassed and disappointed in myself.)
Scared to fail. (And feel like a pile of poo about it.)
I share this because it’s SO common, no matter how big or small your goal is.
Hitting your goals always comes down strong belief in 3 things.
1. Your thoughts about you --“I’m strong!”
2. Your thoughts about your goal-- “I can do that!”
3. Your thoughts about your life circumstances--“There is a shoulder if I need to walk. It’s a good place to practice.”
But instead of focusing on managing our minds in these 3 areas, every one of us will first focus on quick and easy ways to bypass a lot of effort (think: buy a better bike with more gears or a lighter frame, listen to a podcast or look up how to climb hills, look for someone who has already done it and hear their tips and tricks.)
When none of these solutions deliver in the way you hoped they would, you might consider giving up.
THIS is a KEY MOMENT.
Here’s why: because this is the moment when the mind spins out with a lot of discouraging thoughts.
You’ll have thoughts about not being good enough.
About not having what it takes.
You’ll have thoughts about your goal being too hard, too unrealistic, or not meant for you.
You’ll have thoughts about your circumstances.
Now is not the time, I don’t have the energy. I’ll start when the kids are finished school. I’ll start when the kids go back to school. I don’t have the money. I need to think some more.
These thoughts will either be positive, negative, or neutral…but they all have a HUGE impact.
Negative thoughts will make you feel like quitting. “It’s too hard. “I suck at this.” “I don’t have time.”
Other thoughts delay your getting started.
This is totally normal thinking, by the way. You (and I) think we’re the only ones who ever have these types of thoughts. Nope!
Coaching is how to change your game.
Because if you want to hit your goal, if you want things to be different than they are right now, you have to keep going.
And to keep going you need to know how to manage your thoughts.
And, you’ll have to keep managing your thoughts more than once. Because everyone’s brains have their few favorite sentences that they’ll say to themselves over and over. You will need to keep reminding yourself that you don’t listen to your own mental backtalk anymore.
Until those thoughts no longer faze you.
You don’t see them as a stop sign anymore.
I wish someone had told me this sooner. I wish I had known that I don’t have to believe everything that I’m thinking. Knowing that I can question my thoughts has been the most freeing work I’ve ever done.
Because when you start blowing past stop signs, your success is inevitable.
You will MAKE IT!
Here’s the big news: the people who are successful, fail.
They fail A LOT. They didn’t make it on the first try.
Successful people are just better at managing their mind.
They don’t keep changing up what they’re DOING. They just try new ways of THINKING.
New ways of thinking
About themselves.
About their goal.
About their life circumstances.
They think differently.
So they take action differently.
Ultimately, they achieve different results.
Here’s what I chose to think on my bike ride: I was going to conquer that hill no matter what. With as many attempts as it took. If I didn’t make it up on the first try, I would try again another day. Then another day. All the way to the top.
I had to change my mind first.
And I’m sure glad I did.
P.S.- If you’re tired of procrastination, getting in your own way, and not taking your goals seriously enough even when you want to, you have a choice to do things differently. You have the choice to think differently.
I help women build better mind-body connection and empower them to create personalized healthy habits that feel easy. You ready? Book a call